2012

Its been ages since I wrote here. Its 2012. The numbers keep going up. But I still haven't found my peace. There is no place on this Earth that would bring an honest smile of content and serenity on my face. And if there is, it probably is inaccessible. My quest continues. My journey goes on!

Somebody once told me 'Count your blessings Sheetal'. Yes, I do have a roof over my head. Yes, I do have clothes to keep me warm. Yes, I do have food to eat. Yes, I do have kids that fill up the house. And its not that I don't appreciate it. I do know there are a million people in this world who fight for these very basic survival necessities. But my soul and my heart is lost. Lost in a desert. These eyes ocassionally chance upon the glisten of water. But it soon realizes that it's merely a mirage. I still have a long way to go.......with no destination in mind. I just go on as an unknown power pushes me to.

Somebody once told me 'Take life in your hands'. Its yours and you live the way you want it. For this, I will need to go hunt within myself for that courage that'll give me the power to walk my own step and not look at what I leave behind.

If this blog is any indication to the turmoil in my mind and heart, so be it. We all live with our frustrations and put on a happy grin as if all's well. For some, this works. For me, I'll just plug in my headphones and drown myself in the music that fills up my ears and head. I'll dream and I'll try to make meaning of the words that swim out. May be I'll find my inspiration somewhere, someday. And may all of you find it too.